The magic ingredient

Posted: January 7, 2013 in Uncategorized
Tags: , , , ,

On the outside it’s a simple question.

Do you have ‘It’

‘It’ is the magic ingredient that separates those few people from the overwhelmingly large number of people who don’t have ‘it’.

Now what specifically is ‘it’!? ‘It’ isn’t something that only a few people can have, it’s something that everybody on this planet can attain. ‘It’ is a group of behaviours, it is a pattern of actions that lead to a desired goal. Let me give you a few examples of the sorts of behaviour that those who have ‘it’ exhibit (all names are fictional tho most of the stories below are examples of what I have personally seen in clients).

Dan has a tough week ahead, he will be working 12 hour days 7:30-7:30pm plus some evenings in preparation for an important presentation to present to the management team at work next week. Instead of cancelling his training with his training partner or PT he organises to finish work at 7:30, down a protein shake and head to the gym. He trains hard for an hour before getting home at 9:30, eating a quick dinner, prepares meals for the following day before completing an extra hour of work before bed. He then rinses and repeats this day for the rest of the week. There was never any question about making it in for his workouts or making the time to prepare his meals for the following day. He knows that hard graft builds the body and that his food is what fuels his fat loss.

Jodie has a lot of friend’s birthday’s coming up where she will be going out a lot. Instead of conforming and drinking and eating whatever sounds delicious, she decides to drive and carefully select her meals at the restaurants. She is ridiculed by her friends for being ‘obsessed’ or stupid for opting for the salad rather than going for the pizza and chocolate fudge cake for afters.  She doesn’t need to make excuses to them because she knows that to her, her goals are more important to her than conformity to social eating and drinking habits. She knows that the term ‘obsessed’ is a term used by the weak about the dedicated. She’s paving her own route and still having a great time with her friends because she knows that she doesn’t need cake or wine to be happy. Besides she has a workout planned for tomorrow that she wants to be fresh for.

Gerard comes into the gym fresh after a few days rest looking forward to another absolute monster of a session. He leaves an hour or so later, legs shaking and has to pace the car park as his legs just won’t stop burning from the hell he’s just endured.  He paces with a grin on his face, sweat still running down from his forehead.  A year ago he was a lazy, overweight dude that had run out of excuses and was heading to a place called metabolic syndrome where the lucky residents there have a cocktail of high blood pressure, high triglycerides and cholesterol and a very high chance of cardiac disease. Now he’s in the shape of his life still coming back to the gym for more each time, still hungry to erase the memory of who he used to be. He could have given up after his trainer initially told him to cut down on alcohol, to drop a large percentage of his carbohydrates or even when he said he wouldn’t necessarily reach his long term goals for some time.

This last example is one that a very dedicated client gave me before Christmas;

 We all know that Christmas is a time when socialising tends to take precedence above most other things.  So when one of my clients was asked by a work colleague to bum off work early to get a few drinks in before the work’s Christmas party my client replied with

“sorry mate I have a PT session this evening.”

The work colleague came back with;

“Nah, sack that off and come to the pub.  Besides you can always go tomorrow.”

Finally my client silenced his work colleague with;

“It was taking the attitude of doing things tomorrow that got me fat and unhealthy in the first place.  I’m not going to miss my session”

That is a true example of the magic ingredient ‘it’.

‘It” is simply the actions the above example people chose to make in situations that weren’t always easy.  The toughest route is usually the path less travelled on.  It usually reaps the largest rewards but takes the most amount of effort.  Individuals with ‘it’ don’t choose the easy option on the restaurant menu, they choose the option that best suits their goals. They might at that time prefer the burger with chips but they know for a fact that it won’t help them reach their goals so why the hell should they consider it. Hell yeah we only live once and we should enjoy it, but if you are desperately miserable because you can’t eat a burger or an ice cream when you go out because you have fitness or health goals, I would suggest you take a look at your relationship with food.  If giving up that makes you miserable then maybe you aren’t in a position to tell your ‘obsessed’ friend that they need to enjoy themselves. There is more to life than food.

People with ‘it’ don’t make excuses for not making a workout, they make time for it. 

People with ‘it’ make time to prepare their meals for the week, they don’t hide behind the excuse of not having time. They make time.

People with ‘it’ don’t give up when they reach a plateau. They find a way around it or through it because they don’t have the quitting attitude.

People with ‘it’ go to bed early because they know that the extra sleep will help them with their body composition or athletic goals.

People with ‘it’ aim to inspire the people around them, their girlfriends, boyfriends, parents, sons, daughters etc to do better for themselves. 

People with ‘it’ don’t say that they’ll start such and such ‘tomorrow’ or they’ll drop X or Y from their diet in a month or two. They do it. However if they do phase in a behaviour or nutritional change, they plan for it and do it.

People with ‘it’ don’t hide behind excuses of any kind. If they don’t achieve their goals they understand that it is their actions that define whether they achieve them or not. They are responsible for their actions and if they have slipped up or if life has got in the way, they are the people who hold their hands up and admit their mistakes but they are also the people who will jump right back on track and work double hard to undo any lost progress.

If you are reading the above examples and see some of your own actions listed, then you probably have ‘it’. If however you are reading them and do not see any behaviours common with your own then perhaps you haven’t quite found ‘it’ yet.  That doesn’t mean you won’t ever do what it takes, it just means that at this present time you aren’t ready to.  Which is ok, most of the people that I have worked with or trained didn’t always have ‘it’, most of them stumbled across it and once bitten by the rewards of positive actions for themselves, were bitten for life. 

It’s not all as Hollywood as one might imagine. The guy in the example above pacing the car park wasn’t doing a victory dance because he had worked super hard in his training. He was pacing the car park because his legs hurt and sitting down in the car was painful.  Not every workout was like that for him, but that is just a metaphor to show you what some people are willing to do to reach their goals. The girl mentioned above who was mocked by her friends for not drinking or eating the sugar loaded foods that the rest of her friends did of course have doubts.  Yes she felt unsupported and a little hurt that her friends thought she was being silly, but she persevered because she wanted to reach her goals badly.

To finish I’ll leave you with a couple of my favourite quotes regarding people who have that magic ingredient, who are prepared to lead from the front and do whatever it takes.

“Your actions speak so loudly, I cannot hear what you are saying.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

“When you want to succeed as bad as you want to breathe, then you will be successful” – Eric Thomas

Basically, if you want something bad enough, you’ll do what it takes.  You won’t make excuses and you will allow your actions to speak for themselves.

So ask yourself, do you have ‘it’?

 

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